Emergency Contraceptives Under Fire

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In the ongoing saga between Republicans and Democrats regarding the Affordable Care Act, or the pejorative tinged, Obamacare, the creative right has branded,  emergency contraceptives, now, are in the hot seat.

Like all great political battles, turning to science usually elucidates the truth. The politics, although, is several steps behind the well-documented empirical research, as is par for the course whenever politics and science mingle- specifically and tragically in the instance of global climate change.  

All emergency contraceptives actually do, is prevent ovulation. The mechanism of this drug works in a way so that eggs are never dropped. If there is no ovulation, than there is no fertilization.  That means you, in fact, are not killing anything when you take the morning-after or week-after pill.

You see, my dear reader, I’m pro-killing babies, so this is disheartening to say the least.  I was under the assumption that Plan  B was, in fact, a drug that kills unborn babies, or zygotes, if you will (same same, but different).   I totally thought i had killed six babies in February of 2011, the month I dropped 300 dollars to save my unborn child from the throes of my predictably horrible parenting  (I can barely take care of myself, much less a kid).  Plan B, in that case was my Plan A, which the girls didn’t appreciate too much, mainly because they spent the morning after puking up volumes of of waste.   Like Mr. T, I did, “pity their soul,” but my compassion never stood in the way of my carnal desire to spill my unadulterated life force into their vagina. But, I digress.

David Green, CEO of Hobby Lobby,  whines, “These abortion-causing drugs go against our faith.”

David, you’re right, and thank you for bringing me to my next point. An individual’s faith should never serve as defense to sound legislation   Jehovah’s Witnesses should not be allowed to deny their children health care, Muslims should not be allowed to wear the face-concealing burqas into banks, and the most repulsive: Creationism should not be allowed to be  taught in public schools as an alternative “theory” to evolution.

Also, David, you’re stupid argument falls for the pitfalls of the Slippery Slope. Here, David is employing the classic “potential for life” argument for abortion.  It typically goes as follows: it may not be destroying life, per se, but it is destroying the potential for life.  This can be reduced and reduced until the resulting platform is outright preposterous. This is the approach the Catholic Church takes on this matter by condemning condom usage, even in the face of the sprawling AIDS epidemic.

Let me take their logic to the bitter end.   Every time you aren’t having sex, you are preventing the cultivation of life. Every time you masturbate, you are wasting your seed. Each speck of semen contains the propensity of life – the church does actually take this position as well. St. Augustine of  Hippo, perhaps the greatest Christian theologian, equated the male erection with pure sin.

Writing this article brings back memories of a Fox News Q and A  that was held with John Santorum. When asked about abortion, he responded that even in cases of rape and incest, a woman, morally, is not permitted to have an abortion.   Disgusting, I know, but if you take this “pro-life” position you are obliged to maintain this very logic. If you “value” the sanctity of life as some politicians phrase it, you cannot set up conditions on which it is okay to “kill,” if you truly believe abortion is an act of murder. I find it quite deplorable that these self-righteous campaigns for the preservation of life of the unborn are usually levied by the same staunch advocates of capital punishment. This philosophical conundrum befuddles me, as these viewpoints, logically, are mutually exclusive of one another.

Source: NPR